Modern Parables

What might be some parables that Jesus would use today? How can
spiritual truths be explained in the 21st century?

On wanting to be first into the kingdom
Consider the underwear - the clothing worn first and closest to the
skin (unless you are Madonna). Is being first to be put on desirable?
Is not the underwear the grottiest clothing at the end of the day,
reserved for cleansing in scalding hot water and harsh chemicals?
Instead seek to be a cardigan sweater, able to be worn several times
before receiving a gentle cleansing (unless worn by a messy eater).
Though it is the last to be put on, it truly has the higher place of
honor.

Well, maybe that isn't a parable that Jesus would use...

The dreaded invasion from another dimension

A quick, light thought.

Reading about the horrible things that are supposed to happen when the Large Hadron Collider is fully switched on, one of the scenarios is that we open a hole to another dimension, and invading aliens proceed to come in and conquer all the Earth, sending humanity into slavery.

Thinking back over the various Sci-Fi movies I've seen, and books that I've read, I find it interesting that anytime a hole is opened into another dimension we always seem to promptly have an invasion force streaming through it which humanity has to fight off.  Its almost like the other dimensions all either direct these tears in the space-time fabric to always-ready invasion forces, or they have invasion forces ready all over the place - just in case there is a dimension hole opened.

Is this really likely?  Isn't it more likely that the dimension hole will open into some totally random place - maybe a living room where the beings are casually watching their equivalent to 'The Love Boat', when this tear opens and ruins the ending of the show?  I'd expect that we're more likely to have beer cans thrown at us than a prompt invasion from highly trained armed forces.  Maybe we'd have the bad luck to open a dimension hole into their garbage dump...

Why not think of some great outcomes - we open a hole to an alternate dimension where Carbon Dioxide is the breath of life, and they are having trouble with global warming caused by Oxygen?  We could start up a great trade in gas swaps - send them the excess CO2 that we have, pick up the O2 that we need.  Maybe their garbage is pure energy which we can easily harness to provide electricity within this dimension - solving our looming energy crisis.

I say, let the collisions happen - we're much more likely to find the salvation of mankind in the other dimenstions that the LHC opens to us than our own doom.  (And, just in case we do happen to open into the middle of a highly trained and prepared group of alien commandos - I was all for opening the dimension gateway, I appreciate your mercy...)

Judging the sheep and the goats

One of the passages in the Gospel that has bothered me a little bit has always been Matthew 25:31-46.  All people are separated into those who served Christ and those who did not - with eternal rest for those who served and torment for those who did not.  The part that is a little troubling has been that for those who served, it is one small act which receives praise and rest - 'Whatever you did for the least of these, you did for me', while for the others it is one small act not performed - 'Whatever you did not do for the least of these...'.  The troubling thing is that as a Christian, if I fail to provide for somebody hungry and homeless on the street - if I pass him by, is my salvation lost or tarnished?  (Even though there are many passages that teach that salvation cannot be lost - the thought is whether I have deceived myself into thinking that I know Jesus and am saved.)  I sometimes don't feel that I'm in the group of sheep on the right which will enter into rest.

I've thought of these two groups as the people who are doing things, whether they know of the act or not, out of the work of the Holy Spirit in their hears - they are following Christ and doing His work as they are led (the sheep).  The other group (the goats) are the people who are trying to do works to earn the favor of the judge (God), working out of their own motives to gain salvation.  The difference is whether I do good acts to the Body of Christ because I am saved, or whether I do good acts to become saved.  Most of the New Testament teaches that the former is correct - I cannot earn salvation.  This passage can be interpreted that the goats are condemned because they were not absolutely perfect - if they try to earn salvation than a single failure causes them to lose it.  (Paul spends much of the first 4 chapters of Romans teaching the same thing - that it isn't possible to earn salvation, it is a gift given by God through Jesus).  The sheep are praised for having faith in Jesus' work, and showing the fruit of that through a single good act.  One good act done in faith shows salvation, one good act not done in our own will earns condemnation.

In thinking about this in this season of thanksgiving, a new thought was revealed to me - many of the acts that we do are not known to us - how wonderful it will be to meet the people whose lives were changed through some seemingly insignificant act of Gods love done through us.  How many people are going to be thankful for your allowing God to work through you when you are gathered at the throne?  Are you letting Him use you, or are you doing good acts to earn your place?  I think it will be awesome to see fully all the ways that God has worked - I can see some of the work that He did to bring me to Him, how other people and chance encounters worked to place me on the narrow path.  I look forward to meeting those who I have help direct to Jesus even if I don't know it.

TANSTAAFL

That is - "There Aint No Such Thing As A Free Lunch"

Something that, if I remember my college physics properly, is demanded by the Law of Conservation of Energy and the 3rd law of thermodynamics. Also something that most people might think of as 'The law of unintended consequences'.

I've been thinking about the whole climate change thing. I'm not going to disagree with the empirical evidence which points that the average planetary temperature is rising. I'm not sure that anybody has proven what the cause of the warming is. Sorry Al Gore, I don't agree that Carbon Dioxide alone is contributing, especially when I've seen studies that show that the CO2 increase in the atmosphere can't explain the whole temperature increase to date.

Are carbon reductions the right way to go? There seems to be a HUGE push to 'Green Energy' - finding non-hydrocarbon means of producing energy which don't produce carbon. Why? Because a group has clamped onto the CO2 as the cause, so we must reduce the CO2 emissions. However, while I see a lot of calls to reduce use of carbon-burning energy generation, I haven't seen much call yet to actually reduce the amount of energy which is consumed... What if part of the warming is being caused by the excess heat that we are producing? We lay blacktop all over in cities, and see warming because we are now putting down a surface which converts light to heat. We have to be comfortable, so we have air-conditioning (and heat from furnaces) which push heat out to the environment. Cars are pretty bad in harnessing the energy from burning gasoline - there is a lot of excess heat to be gotten rid of (through the radiator). Computers are producing great amounts of excess heat. Most of the means we use to produce electricity produce excess heat that has to be released to the environment (wind and hydro-power I think are the only exceptions).

We harness a tiny portion of the solar energy which falls on the earth every day - so one of the ways to reduce carbon production has been to look to wind and solar power. What might be some of the unintended consequences? Is it possible that by putting out arrays of mirrors and solar panels to collect energy that we reduce local heating effects - leading to general cooling? Remember that the average temperature on the planet is produced based on solar heating. If we were to efficiently capture more solar energy, the law of conservation of energy says that the energy isn't being used for something else (heating the air), so we might cool off more than expected. I'm neglecting that unless we stop producing so much waste heat it might just balance out. I'm also neglecting that other than putting solar farms in deserts, we probably lose some good vegetated land in this process...

There have been studies of the unintended consequences of wind power - some local changes in weather have been observed downwind of large wind farms, because energy has been sucked from the moving air, and thus winds are a bit lighter. I've also read one study that the reduction in air pressure behind a wind turbine can kill bats and birds.

What I'm trying to say is that we can't put up big wind farms and solar arrays to generate electricity without there being some other impact. We are taking in solar energy which reduces the energy available to other natural processes which have been going on for a long time (generally involved in heating things). The impact may be small, it may be offset by human heat generation, or it may be beneficial (cooling deserts enough to be habitable?) - but there will be an effort. We can't get energy without having some impact on our environment.

Part of what this thinking has lead to for me is some sensitivity to how much energy can be conserved. I do try to bike to work instead of driving. We try to turn off lights as much as possible. There is probably a ton more that I can do. I don't know that we can maintain the way of life that we currently enjoy - something has to change to reduce the overall footprint - not just our carbon footprint.

Climate control guilt

So - I'll apologize to anybody that gets upset by the comparisons I have in this post about relative comfort and temperatures in different areas. To be completely honest, a year ago I would have said you were completely bonkers if you said I'd be living in Arizona, and would be on the side of thinking that people are completely insane to live here in the summer.

At this point, I'll say that you don't have to be completely insane, just willing to put up with a higher electricity bill than I'd ever seen before. You want to limit the time between the car and getting inside a building, since it is so #*&^ hot outside in the summer. Of course, I'd say the same about the 3 months of winter in Chicago - you want to limit the time between the car and getting inside a building. Basically, I've just flipped the inconvenient seasons. Please keep that in mind - while you (while most people that I think read this) are in a place just entering the inconvenient uncomfortable season, I just went through it and am finally able to do things outside.

I was thinking earlier today, that we generally tried to not turn on the heat in the house until October. My frugal soul just really had trouble justifying heating up the inside when it was still generally nice outside. We tried to not turn it on after May 1 - same reason. Now, I'm feeling a similar twinge of climate control guilt at turning on the A/C in October. I'm not trying to gloat - we had temperatures over 100 degrees last weekend which is a bit uncomfortable to be going outside. But, turning on the A/C in October feels like turning on the heat in September - it doesn't seem right. We just had a nice week where we didn't have the A/C on at all, and enjoyed the breeze blowing through the house, having to close everything up again seems like betrayal.

It does cool off fast in the evening now, so I need a jacket in the morning for walking or biking. No - I haven't acclimated that fast, I would wear a jacket biking in 55 degree weather in Chicago too. The only difference is that it is 55 in the morning and 90 in the afternoon... I won't say that I miss raking up the leaves (which we'd be doing now in Grayslake), and I won't complain about not having to shovel snow 2 months from now. I will miss having fall colors nearby - leaves just up and fall off trees without a color change here. I'm sure I'll miss seeing everything green up in spring. I already miss the break from mowing the lawn (we just planted winter grass, so that we keep the yard green and soft, instead of brown and crunchy once the Bermuda grass goes to sleep).

Everything is a trade off...

Whassup?

I thought I'd put together a short catchup post to let people know how things are going here - rather than share any real thoughts.

We've been in Arizona about 4 months now (almost 5), and pretty much settled in. We've been attending East Valley Bible Church in Gilbert, and starting to get involved in things there. I'm helping in one of the first grade Sunday school classes - something pretty new as I've been avoiding childrens ministry for a while - but its been fun so far. We've also gotten plugged into a home group in the area, and I've been attending a mens study group on Thursday mornings before work. Its been nice the last few weeks to be able to find people we know at church - as big as the church is it is surprising how easy it is to find people you know (once you've met a few people...)

It's starting to cool off here, I've been able to bike to work most days, and we're seeing highs in the 90s again - I know its a lot warmer than what MN and IL have been seeing all summer, but it is nice - going out in the evening when its 92 is pretty nice - about like taking a nice walk when its around 78 in Chicago. I don't know if I'm getting used to the hot temperatures (and will be shivering when it gets colder) or that the lack of humidity really makes a difference.

Work is going well - there is plenty to do, mostly I've been involved in cleaning up some documentation issues that have existed for a while - we're still restarting development work on the project, and its nice to have some time to clean up issues. Things are starting to pick up in terms of development and planning for the next phases though, so I'm sure that there will be more interesting problems to tackle soon. In the meanwhile its been nice to be able to hold to 40 hours a week. I've been getting in around 7:30, and can leave at 4PM, which is nice since there is some time to play with the kids before dinner, and I can help with dinner most nights. Things are starting to get busy in the evenings now too, with kids activities and things, so we are hopping through most of the week.

That's about all we have right now. Nothing really major or problematic - just settling into a routine again after the fall activities have started up.

Is the proposed Heath Care Reform the right thing?

Something quick about my views on the health care debate. I don't want to be mistaken for somebody who is against the plan just because it is pushed by the Democrats, or that I think poor people don't deserve good care. I'm not sure that the solution which is being proposed is the right one.

Part of what I do for a living is to analyze problems in software. In particular, when we see a problem, we don't just jump into fixing what we can see - first we determine if what is observed is actually the problem, or just a symptom of the problem. Most of the issues that people see with Microsoft Windows are actually symptoms. When your web browser crashes it rarely is because of a defect in the web browser - its because of a defect in another piece of software that destabilizes the browser, causing it to crash. Finding the actual root cause of the problem can be very difficult. I've spent weeks tracking down traces of issues to get back to what really happened to cause what was observed.

My biggest fear is that we (as a nation, and the political leaders in Washington D.C. in particular) haven't taken the time to look at the root cause of the problem. What are the symptoms that we can observe:

1. Health care is too expensive - people generally cannot afford care unless they have insurance. Both doctor visits and medicine can be extremely expensive
2. Health insurance is too expensive - unless you have a good job and an employer that pays most of the premiums
3. Some people go bankrupt trying to pay medical bills, or don't get the treatment they need and die because they don't have the money
4. Hospitals are closing in some areas (going bankrupt or losing money and closing for business reasons)
   

If you've spent much time looking at this, these are all related. Because of (1), (3) happens (people can't pay for coverage, or go broke paying). (1) leads to (2) - the money collected in insurance premiums has to cover the expenses, or the insurance company goes bankrupt. If medical costs increase, insurance costs increase. (4) is a side effect of (3) - enough people that don't pay and the hospital has to do something, maybe leading to (1). As insurance companies try to fix (2), they pressure doctors and hospitals to lower their rates which also may contribute to (4).

A lot of reasons have been given for why health care is so expensive:

• Greed - the doctors need those big homes and private club fees...
• Uninsured - people without insurance can't afford care, so don't pay, and the charges for everybody are raised to compensate - when I pay the hospital I'm paying my bill and part of somebody elses
• Legitimate office expenses - the people working in the doctors office need to be paid, and they (like everybody) expect to get more money every year
• Illegitimate office expenses - things that are maybe also symptoms of the problem. Doctors now need to have staff dedicated to billing and handling insurance claims. Malpractice insurance keeps going up. Paper work and bureaucracy (HIPAA anyone?) lead to more paper-pushers needed everywhere.
• Illegal aliens are using medical resources and not paying
• Space aliens are making everybody sick...

OK, maybe the last one isn't a real reason. I do know that the doctors office we were going to in Illinois went bankrupt and was bought out by a larger health care organization. I do know that Illinois has extremely high malpractice rates, high enough that doctors move their practice to Wisconsin. I also see that my insurance company knocks off 30-70% of what the doctor bills - money which he won't get paid and can't charge me for. Either the doctor was really padding his bills, or he's losing money on insured patients.

The goverment's solution? To create a new bureaucracy and make sure that everybody gets Health insurance. This is at best a band-aid on the symptom - we make sure that everybody gets to contribute to make sure that everybody has insurance to pay the outrageous medical bills. And, we need to pay more taxes to staff the new bureaucracy which will govern the insurance plans. No real mention of how health costs will be brought under control - as new government regulations come in costs are likely to go up as more staff is needed to manage the insurance twists. We aren't addressing why medical care is expensive, only making sure that everybody is insured and able to pay for it - while possibly also driving the medical profession out of business through lower negotiated rates.

This band-aid is only asking for the problem to ooze out of a different area - if health costs are not controlled, then health insurance costs will continue to grow - and with the government backing insurance for all that will hit you and me in the pocket. We just push off the problem to a later time.

Maybe some part of the debate should be about how to reign in the costs of providing health care - how can the cost of doing business be reduced for doctors? Can malpractice insurance rates be reduced through meaningful tort reform? I don't want to prevent people from getting redress for negligence on the part of a doctor - but I don't want them suing over something that the doctor had no control over either. Is health insurance the right approach to take in the first place - whether public or private? I don't have the answers - but it sure looks to me like the Congress has chosen a solution, whether it is the right one or not, and are going to enact it whether I like it or not. It isn't clear that the solution addresses what the real problem is, instead of providing a temporary band-aid.

Things I never thought I'd say

So, if you had told me a year ago that right now I'd have relocated to Phoenix, Arizona I would have told you that you're crazy. I had no plans to leave my previous employer, I didn't forsee selling our beloved house in Grayslake, and if I were to move for some reason it more likely would be further north. But.... this is now, and the aforementioned move has happened. So, I find myself saying a few things that I might not have otherwise ever said in my life -

"Its 9PM and its still 100 degrees outside!"

"Its pretty cool today - only supposed to be 104 - I can bike to work."

"Look - a dust storm warning."

"Remember to pick up rocks carefully..."

A few other new observations:

I downed an entire 16 ounce bottle of water in 7 miles of biking on my way home last week (in the previously mentioned 104 degrees).

I am getting up at 5:15 AM to get out and do a 10 mile bike ride before it gets too hot (its only been 90 that early).

Did you know you can bake on the grill?

The car doors have black handles on the outside. This can be painful if the sun has been shining on the door you want to open...

--
We are doing pretty well - things have settled down, we have adjusted to the new house and routines. We are looking forward to still being able to do a lot outside in the winter, and to seeing visitors then (since no sane person comes to Arizona in the summer...)

How's it going?

A few very quick notes on the move, and the new job. Things are going pretty well here so far. I have started work at General Dynamics, and while I have a lot of learning to do (being a completely new and different problem domain for me) there are a lot of things that actually are similar to solutions that I used before - different problem but a similar way to solve it - so I am getting to know what's going on. Working for a defense contractor, security is definitely handled differently than what I had at my previous position. The requirement that employees also be US citizens also changes the demographics of the workplace quite a lot - there are not a lot of immigrants to be seen.

We're working through a stomach bug right now (or its working through us?). I spent about half of the weekend in bed, and am still not completely over it - food isn't as appealing right now, but I can at least eat. Not the best start to things - work for a week and then get sick!

On the home front, we're in a 3-bedroom apartment right now (furnished) and we are scheduled to close on our house May 20 - 2 weeks away. There doesn't seem to be anything holding up the closing right now, I just need to provide a pay stub to the mortgage company (but I don't get my first paycheck until May 14). We can take multiple trips to move the stuff we have here over to the new house, unlike the move down here, so that can be a bit more relaxed. We had a pretty uneventful drive down here, all the pets survived and all the kids (though sometimes the kids were in danger as we ate in restaurants). We took it easy, stopping along the way to see some of the sights. We did stop at an actual 'Route 66' era diner in New Mexico for lunch one day, which was kinda cool, even if they weren't trying to stay in the '50s character. I think that knowing that we were at a diner which has just kept doing the same thing was more satisfying than a touristy 'Route 66' experience would be.

That's all for now. My main reason for not posting sooner really was that I've been going to bed early the last few nights as I'm working to recover - not even playing Bejeweled Blitz on Facebook...

Almost time

Tomorrow the movers come to start packing up our stuff, they load the van on Friday. We stick around this weekend, then start driving on Monday. We'll be in an apartment for 30 days in Scottsdale, then close on our house May 20 and we'll be able to settle in.

For those interested we have the following things to do:
Wed-Thurs-Fri - Supervise the packing and loading, making sure that key items we need don't get loaded on the truck. This may involve putting them into the van/car or in a neighbors garage.
Wed - take the love seat out to the curb for the garbage men to take away. I've had this 18 years, but the frame is broken and springs are sprung, so it can't be given away.
We have given away a lot of stuff that we don't need, using Freecycle (freecycle.org) to find takers.

Friday evening we meet with some neighbors to say goodbye.
Saturday we have a memorial service for Kris's Grandmother.
Sunday is a Gymnastics meet.

Then, we start driving:
Monday - Grayslake to St. Louis, MO with a visit to the gateway arch.
Tuesday - St. Louis to Tulsa, OK, with a planned stop at Wilson's battlefield
Wednesday - Tulsa to Amarillo, TX
Thursday - Amarillo to Gallup, NM - the longest drive of the trip at 418 miles
Friday - Gallup to Scottsdale and our apartment, the shortest day of the trip

Then, a weekend to get settled and I start work on Monday April 27. That will be an adjustment, I've been working a lot on the house for almost 3 months, so getting back into software might take a little bit.

Hearing from God

1 Kings 19:11-13 (New International Version)

¹¹ The LORD said, "Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD, for the LORD is about to pass by."
Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. ¹² After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. ¹³ When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.
Then a voice said to him, "What are you doing here, Elijah?"

God's voice can be hard to hear sometimes over the noise of the world around us. What He speaks can be bent by others, and by our own interpretation. What seems powerful and urgent is not always the word of God.

Isaiah 30:21 (New International Version)

²¹ Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it."

If you've read my previous blog, you know that I am wrestling to hear clearly and follow God's will for me and my family. In particular, I have been praying that God clearly illuminates where I am to go work, by shutting down or making all other possibilities unattractive. I have also been praying for his clear revelation, that somebody would essentially come up to me and say "God wants you to work in xxx".

This morning as I was praying I feel that it was revealed that (a) I'm asking for the wrong revelation and (b) I'm listening to the wrong thing. I'll explain (b) first.

There have been two sets of input that we (Kris and I) have received in regards to my job situation. The first is from people who are aware of what is going on and are praying for us, or generally trying to offer advice. Whether godly people or not, we seem to get more negative input from this group - that the path we are looking at is not the right path. Much of this is based on emotion - fear for our safety, grief at the loss of friends moving away, desire to have us closer to family members. All of this input, while not unbiblical, does not seem to consider what God might have planned. I call these 'the word of the world'.

The second set of input has been from people who don't know the details of what we are evaluating, yet are delivering words which are divinely inspired. This includes words which Kris and I may receive ourselves during our prayer and devotional time (these coming directly from the Holy Spirit). [I'll apologize to those who do not have a close personal relationship with Jesus - this may seem like a lot of spiritual mumbo-jumbo, but it is very real to us - we can certainly talk with you in detail about why and how we believe that Jesus is real, alive and helps us.] These words all seem to be leading positively towards the path we see before us. I say seem because we do have to interpret the words we receive. It is possible that we are missing the interpretation - however, there are a number of different things we've heard from different sources, individually, that all together point in the path we see. Any of these individually could be interpreted to go somewhere else, but together it is difficult to see God saying anything but what is before us. We feel that we have the working of God as described in the passage from Isaiah above - when we look back on the promises of God, and his guiding words, we can see that we are on the right path. These are the 'words of God'.

I also said I was asking for the wrong revelation. I was asking to see where God wants us to be. The right question is to ask where God is working, and how He wants me to join. One of the things that we realized yesterday is that due to some aspects of the current economic situation, we may well be able to afford a much nicer home than we have now - in particular in a more upscale neighborhood. Looking at this from God's view, there is a known tendency for people who are well off to be self-reliant, they feel they don't need God. We currently live in a good, vibrant community, with many neighbors who profess Jesus as their Savior (not all do, but many). This I feel to be a spiritually safe place (maybe also because of the two churchs across the street...). By moving to a new neighborhood which does not respect the need for God, we move to a spiritually darker place, someplace that while it may be physically safe is not spiritually safe. One thing that I heard this week in a sermon was that if you feel that you are safe, then you aren't doing God's work. We need to be out in the world, so that people can see and learn to know Jesus. One way is to be in a place of people who are hurting economically and need to know good news of the eternal provision which is available for them.

So, the more we compare notes and interpret what each other has received, the more alignment we see in one direction - that we will be moving, and this will be difficult for us and our families - but there is some immediate good we can see, as well as some long-term possibilities.

We don't have a date just yet - I have been told by HR that an offer is being prepared, and they are trying to get the right management in the office to approve that, and then I will learn of whether this is the path God has for us or if he has been testing my discernment...

What to do...

So, I'm at a bit of a crossroads spiritually and emotionally. I've had one good interview in my job search, but its a bit further away from my extended family. I have a lot of pressure from some of my extended family to seek a position in Minnesota, but haven't really made much headway in getting somebody to look at my resume yet... I'm trying to see if God's will for me to stay here (in Chicago) last year is still His will, or if I am to do His work elsewhere. I'm resting in a fog of doubt and uncertainty, pondering what might be and probably getting ahead of myself with wishful thinking...

Part of the problem is dissociating my desires and will from what God wants me to do. I have a craving for new things and variety - a big move to a new company, doing new projects in a new house is certainly going to provide a big dose of change and variety. So, first off is to figure out if I'm leaving the Chicago area for greener (or snowier) pastures. God called me to stay here last year, to to take a position in the leadership of our Church. I want to be very certain that I am following His will if I leave here. This hasn't been clear to me so far - nobody has stood up and told me 'God says Go West young man!'. This may be a test of my discernment...

Another part is making sure that I go through this with the right motives, again following where God would have me to be. I don't want to follow the money, or feel that I need to provide for my family (immediate or extended) - but I need to trust in God's provision. Certainly it will be easy if when I get an offer it is such an obvious low-ball offer that its clear that I can't take that position, but what if it isn't? I've been praying for God to make clear to me what the position is that I should take, that he closes down all other options. I've already had one phone interview end quickly because it was apparent that while I filled the role, there wasn't going to be an acceptable offer forthcoming. Where I start getting my self mired in uncertainty is by following this line of thought:

What if I get an offer that is acceptable, but still haven't heard from God to verify this?
What if there is something better coming up, and though this seems good it is really a 'closed door'?
Can I make the right decision on something that is acceptable to me, or will my excitement drown out the holy spirit warning me about a position?

I can't prove a positive outcome - the negative is easy (no offer, bad role, not a fit). Something that isn't negative might not be best - I can only pray for the discernment to know, to see the choir of angels that delivers 'THE' offer to me... ;) Only God can prove the positive (through that hypothetical choir of angels...).

More of the problem is that it's easy to take opportunities that have been presented and work them to a logical conclusion - which of course means getting the dream job that the posting represents. So I've been thinking about how wonderful it would be to live in Phoenix and bike more of the year, how awesome to be in Minnesota with family nearby, how we can sell our current house for a lot, and get a great house cheap (and worked out all the issues of how to finance, move, etc.). It becomes easy to put my interpretation on events and what I do hear from God, blessing each of these options...

I appreciate your ongoing prayers to help me see the path, to have discernment to follow Gods will for my family, to not be swayed by money, or family desires, or fears but to hold true to the eternal provision and be faithful to that.

What's going on?

Hi all - if you've been following things here, you know that my group was suddenly further reduced, including me, so my illustrious career in mobile phone design is more or less over... What am I doing now that I have an extra 40 hours a week?

1) Looking for the next job - already working on that, had a few phone calls already. Ideally, I work out a start date of March 30, which is just after my 'official' last day (60 days notice thing), and would allow me to keep/save/use all of the 26 weeks of severance. Collecting unemployment benefits requires that I do a certain amount of time searching for a new position.

2) Working through some career transition classes. Part of the severance package is 6 months of transition support services - consulting to get my resume in order, interviewing, negotiation help - along with a placement service. So, I start through some of those classes this week and next.

3) Work around the house - there are a lot of projects that haven't been getting done, and now they are. We're figuring that if we have to move (seems likely) we should finish all the things we started. If we don't have to move, then we get a like-new house... :) Some of the things that have to be done:

• Paint the kitchen cabinets
• Fix a big hole in the kitchen wall with a bunch of wires coming out of it (don't know who made that, we found it when the suspended ceiling was removed)
• Paint the kitchen walls
  
• Finish installing baseboards in the master bedroom
• Paint the master bathroom (clean up the mildew first)
• Clean mildew from the master bath shower, and replace some caulk and grout that is loose
• Figure out how to fix the shower once-and-for-all so that it stops leaking
• Fix the big hole in the family room ceiling below the shower drain...
• Fix a big hole in the kids bathroom wall (caused when a sliding door fell off track)
• Paint the kids bathroom
• Paint the upstairs hall
• Touch up some ceiling spots that got wall paint on them in the dining and living rooms
• Paint trim in the master bedroom
• Fix the front door lockset
• Paint the window frames in the basement
• Replace a basement door that was abused by toys (and is a little holey)
• Replace some ceiling tiles in the basement
• lots of paint touch-up in the basement (maybe repaint the basement)
• Finish updating the phone wiring (figure out which wires go to phone jacks that were removed...)
• Paint ceiling on the basement stairs
• Paint celing in the office
• Clean out the fireplace (still ashes in there from the last fire 5 years ago)
  
• etc

You get the picture - plenty of stuff to do. At some point we also need to look into replacing most of the carpet in the house - a lot is +25 years old, and well worn at this point. If we do have to sell, and it doesn't happen when there is snow on the ground, add to the list some major grass renovation work and garden cleanup...

4) Update my coding skills a little bit - it has been a while since I actually wrote software... (vs. telling other people how to write it) Anybody need some programs written?

5) Goof off. We went to the Museum of Science and Industry today - not many people there, which was great. I need another 400,000 points in Lego Star Wars to buy the minikit detector, and find the last minikit I'm missing - then I'll have completed the game.

So, I don't have to worry much about going insane from boredom...

God provides

So, if you've read the previous two days postings you know that my current management doesn't feel that I'm needed anymore. Even though the loss of a job might seems like a big thing, and something that might cause some to doubt God's provision, I can already see how He is working through this, and how He was working even before I knew about my position being reduced:

1) On Thursday morning I had an email in my inbox from a colleague I'd worked with on other projects before, who is in a 'safe' division (one that is still profitable, and likely to stay that way). That group is expanding, and has some openings. So, there is at least one possible opportunity which would cause only a change in my duties, and not in my employment status.

2) Because of the size of the reduction, there is a legal requirement for 60 day notification. Though my last day worked is due to be Jan 30, I remain on the payroll with full benefits (including accruing vacation, which will be paid in April). This accounts to a legally required paid vacation for two months...

3) I have through industry standards activity in the last few years made a number of contacts and references which may be useful. There are people outside of my current group who feel that I am still needed, and are escalating the issue, so my status may be reversed.

While this seems like a nice, rosy set of good provisions, I also have to say that He doesn't always clear up problems in a nice easy package - there may be some lessons He is trying to teach through the experience. I still have the emotional impact to deal with, and still have to take some actions to secure my position. I have to trust Him and listen carefully for how to proceed - to remain in Grayslake (which I felt to be the calling last year) or to take steps I may feel are needed to remain employed, even if that involves moving away. I have to fight through what might be a greedy, world-induced desire to maximize my financial gain (seek work elsewhere and keep the most of the severance package) and see His true path. If no internal opportunity arises, I have to trust in His provision and leadership - that He will provide employment before we run out of money, and to see clearly where we should go or stay and what adjustments may be necessary.

Part of this experience is to remind me not to put trust in anything of the world - but to trust in God for provision. Perhaps we will become missionaries - that is a safe job which will not go away (until Jesus returns at least) - though the pay is much les....

Live blogging from layoff land (2)

It seems that I, and most of the rest of my team, are no longer needed. At least I now know the direction to take, and will likely have some extra free time after Jan. 30 (and as much as I can steal before then).

Live blogging from Layoff land

So, if you've read the news today you probably saw a story about my employer releasing 4000 people this week. Meetings are going on around here today and tomorrow, where people learn their fate. I have a mandatory, in-person meeting (with the rest of my team) set for 1:30. Either we all stay or we all leave is my take - just don't know which yet.

I will provide information when I learn it. I'm not overly concerned either way - if I get to leave, it might involve a move; if I stay I have to deal with deteriorating morale in a company which still hasn't shown that it can sort out management and program inefficiencies to compete in todays cell-phone market. Not sure which is better - one hand has 26 weeks of severance pay and 2 months of medical insurance (plenty of time to lean on my network to find a position), the other has continuing job security - though at a company which is rapidly going into the ground...

Why we need God

I've seen a number of things in the last week that I find interesting, as they point out a few truths from the Bible, and how we need God, even if we don't want to admit that.

There have been a number of 'displays' created by atheist groups, joining in the nativity, menorah, etc. displays around the country. I find it interesting how as these groups explain what they are doing, that they feel they need to convince people that we are 'past the religious superstition of the past'. The atheists recognize that people (and this is from all culture groups and countries) seem to always seek after some 'myth' that leads to greater explanation of what is going on... While some of the 'myths' have been answered by science (which I think is the premise of the atheist argument - that science has provided answers for all the reasons that people seek religious explanations) there are a number which have not - we don't know just how the universe began, we don't know how awareness in humans comes about, and we don't know why humans in particular enjoy some things like music.

I also read an interesting article about 'humanism' as a 'religion'. This is a growing movement to provide the rituals and fellowship that are found in a church, without being religious (other than perhaps worshiping humanity...). This also points to a huge need within people to be part of something larger - that we aren't satisfied being alone, and weren't created to be self-sufficient. The 'Humanists' seek the relation, but don't want religion (yet, they are creating something like a religion in providing the framework for the relation...).

This need to be part of something larger is really our (humanity's) desire to be in right relation to God. We were created to be with God (look at Genesis 2, the story of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden). Because of sin (see Genesis 3) we can't have that relation. That need is 'written' into us - it is part of our being, it is made clear, as in Romans 1-20:

For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities - his eternal power and divine nature - have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse.

(read Romans 1-3 for a really great explanation of how this need for relation exists, and why we can't have it - Romans 4-8 talk about the solution).

So, if the explanation to our 'obsessive and irrational need' to be in something greater, which leads to the perceived need for religion and ritual, is found in God, why isn't that obvious to all? Because we (humans with free will) have again (and continue to) rejected God.

Romans 2:5 - But because of your stubborness and your unrepentant heart, you are storing up wrath against yourself for the day of God's wrath, when his righteous judgement will be revealed.

Those who seek to be free from God will :

Be ever hearing, but never understanding;
be ever seeing, but never perceiving.
Make the heart of this people calloused;
make their ears dull and close their eyes.
Otherwise they might see with their eyes,
hear with their ears,
understand with their hearts,
and turn and be healed.
- Isaiah 6:9-10

If we refuse to accept God, we will not be able to understand His ways and His doings, and will not be able to see the mercy which He has for us. This is the missing piece in the above examples - people who have consciously separated themselves from God (the definition of an atheist) cannot see the work of God, and have to seek within Human knowledge for why things are the way they are - when the truth is that God placed them there. Why do humans enjoy music? So that they may encounter God in music, and because He loves music. Why do humans feel a need for religion? We were created to worship God.

If you don't understand what I've written here, maybe you need to find a way to relation with God. Because of our sin, only one way exists - through knowing the rising Jesus as your Redeemer and Savior - He who dies as a sacrifice for your sins, so that you may approach God as holy and blameless...

Cute Kidisms

New quote - yesterday evening, after we watched a taped broadcast of the Nutcracker Ballet, Jessi asked 'Is BB King still alive?". We said we thought so, and asked why she wanted to know. Jessi explained that she thought she saw him in the finale scene of the ballet.....

We had to explain that his music is a little different than what you would find in a ballet...